Where do we go from here?

I am starting to feel uneasy once again.  When visiting my mother today, she mentioned that the cardiologist said that she would probably be released by the end of the week.  My mother reminded her that she can't walk yet, that she has been in the bed for two weeks.   The Doctor said that they would be working on that and that a case manager should be by tomorrow to discuss her discharge options.

So now I have a billion questions and thoughts- is she going to be ok enough to be released into the care at Woodside Terrace?  Or will she need to be released to another skilled nursing type facility?   The main issue right now is the lack of mobility because of the leg/foot wounds.  However, because of this she has been on a catheter and not able to get out of bed for the bathroom now for two weeks.   So  her level of care may be too extreme for Woodside Terrace.   This all makes me very uneasy, I just don't know how much more of this she can take.   I'm not sure how much more of all this I can take.  I just want her to get better and be able to resume a somewhat normal quality of life and enjoy and have fun.  Is this really too much to ask?

I know she is depressed and bummed that she's not having fun.  I can't say that I blame her.  How much fun can anyone have in a hospital?  She is lonely at night and has said that much.   But other than her stupid leg/foot issue- she is doing pretty well overall.  They have her on 1/2 liter of oxygen- of course that may change once she is mobile and starts to walk around, etc.  But then again, maybe not- they always did think she would get off the Oxygen, that it wouldn't be long term.

I am feeling a bit uneasy about all of this because I am a planner, I like to have things in place, I like to have a plan.  I have several trips coming up next week and the week after and I want to be able to feel secure to go away, knowing that she is ok.  I mean let's face it, I am the constant in her life, I go visit her everyday, I try to bring her some level of normalcy or happy to her day.  I know I can get Bill or my brother to visit her on the days that I will be gone, but right now I'm just sort of freaked out not knowing where this will be.  If not Sequoia or Woodside Terrace- then where?   Hopefully, tomorrow the case worker will shed some light on the discharge plan and I'll feel better about that.

Things need to get better, things need to return to "normal" in our lives.  The Harper family (all of us) are very wiped out on so many levels, we are ready for a fresh start- a new year, positive enegy, positive outcomes.