Things are getting a little bit better....
One step at a time and life will return to some form or shape that resembles "normal" for me. Mom was discharged from the Palo Alto Nursing facility on Tuesday. She had a follow up appointment with Dr. Gillon and the toe healing process is looking very good, she may start to remove some stitches next week. She then had a hair appointment, getting herself all ready to return "home" to Woodside Terrace. I am happy to report that mom seems to really like her new apartment. I think she is very happy to be reunited with her "things" and has been working furiously since arriving to unpack knick knacks and put them in place. Yesterday, she asked me to bring a hammer so that she could hang a few little things. She's so proud of herself and her progress in getting her apartment ready. She is cleaning out clothes and shoes so that she doesn't keep anything that she will really never use, so that will free up some much needed space. She is doing a lot of walking to/from the dining room area and the activity room, so she is definitely getting her exercise. In her apartment, she walks around without any assistance. It's really quite amazing. Today her leg and foot were a bit swollen- not terribly, but enough to notice so I called her Doctor and she advised to try the water pills that we had on hand and give it the weekend to see how it goes- if it's still swollen on Monday, then they will want to see her I suppose. I am hoping that it's just some water build up from being on her feet for so much all of a sudden. Gosh, hate to tell her to slow down when she is having so much fun doing things.
We met her neighbor across the hall, a very nice woman by the name of Marianne. She is probably a few years younger than my mom- but she goes to St Pius and goes to the Senior Center. I think that she and mom could become good friends. I think mom is now starting to feel more at home with the activities and seeing that there are some very independent people at Woodside Terrace and she is one of them. All in all, it is going well for her at this point and I hope and pray that this continues.
My brother is hanging in there, he still has not definitive word on when he'll get his money from the house sale, so until he knows when and how much, he remains in limbo not really knowing what the next step will be. He is looking at options and seeing what his best plan will be once that is determined, but damn the guy has just had so many hits- it's about time for things to really start turning around for him! Winning the lottery about now would be a very good thing! We are all living pretty well under one roof right now. Dealing with some neighbors who are a bit upset that parking is hard to come by in the "guest spots" because many residents are not following the parking rules- well we are breaking the rules by taking up 3 spots at night- but I've really had the mind set of "I really don't give a shit" because I have followed the rules for 10 years and watched many abusers over the years - this is an exception, it's not forever, it's a temporary thing. At some point, we'll have to do something different - but like I said, I'm not the first nor will I be the last to break parking laws around good old Kentfield Manor. Bottom line, nobody is going to enforce the rules- and paying someone to do it is not a responsible choice. We are definitely at a shortage for parking around here, so what you going to do when you can't get parking on the street, but there is a vacant guest slot? Easy decision. Just one more reason as to why we need to get the heck out of here and build our own house someplace. Tired of all the HOA bullshit!
Life has been super busy the past couple of weeks. We had an amazing time in Vegas this past weekend with Jamie, Jacqui, Michael & Patrick. Lots of fun, great weather- quality pool time. I was a happy girl. I think Bill had a good birthday as well! Work has been busy and I have been subbing a lot of classes at the gym. Getting ready to launch Body Pump 82 tomorrow at Gold's and Sunday at the JCC...I think I'm ready and it's a great release. I'm already sore thinking about it! I will be crippled by next weekend- I can't even count, but other than the 4th of July, I am teaching Body Pump everyday through next Saturday! I think it's some crazy 9 classes in 7 days! Sucks that PAC has not launched the new releases, so when I sub there this week I'm going to have to pull out older choreography from the memory banks. That should be fun!
Anyway, off to bed so I can dream of Body Pump music. If I can get up early I plan to go to 24 Hour Fitness in Sunnyvale to take pictures of my friends launching Body Pump 82 on a huge stage to a room of 100 participants. Kristy & Orna are team teaching with the one and only Steven Renata, I have to say that I am a bit jealous. It really sucks that 24 hour is getting all of these Les Mills formats and that I am not employed there anymore. It is where I started with Body Pump 12 years ago and I left because of inadequate pay, lack of raises after many requests and it didn't help matters that they had dropped Body Pump after having been with the club for about 3 years! I was devastated and back then there simply were no clubs nearby with Body Pump. Interesting how things work out.
Ok- time for zzzzzzzzzzz's
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Missing my Daddy!
Today was Dad's birthday, he would have been 83 years old and it is sad that he was taken from us at the very young age of 60, to think that he will have been gone 23 years in September just blows my mind. He certainly fought a good fight, but just had to fight it at such a young age, especially when you compare him to my mom who has pretty much been in excellent health until the last two years and she is quite the fighter. It makes me proud to know that I come from such strong, feisty genes!
When picking my Giants game this season, like always I try to get weekend games first and then if I have to get weeknight games it has to be nights that I don't teach at the gym and then I'll usually get 1-2 day games because after all, it's fun to play hooky every now and then and spend a workday afternoon at the ballpark! Well, knowing June 13th was my Dad's birthday, the Giants were in town and it was a Wednesday night, one that I don't teach, I had to get those tickets. I took my brother with me tonight, which is also fitting because I know that Dad has been proud over the years to look down and see us at so many Giants games, following his footsteps so to speak. I have always said that once Pac Bell Park was built (yes, it is always Pac Bell to me, although I can sort of grasp AT&T park, never grabbed SBC park), but I have always felt my Dad's presence at the ballpark. I actually had tears the first time I was at the park because I just knew that my dad would have loved that place and he would have loved to see his team playing there.
I grew up going to Giants games with my Dad on weekends and holidays- we sat 3 rows behind home plate and I got to meet many players over the years. I was a true fan from that young age, loved my Giants through thick and thin. I have been riding the highs for the last decade at Pac Bell park with all of the Barry Bonds milestones, the World Series in 2002 and then the World Series in 2010 and tonight adding to the excitement- Franchise History in the making, Matt Cain pitches a no-hitter, a perfect game- no hits, no walks, no errors- NADA, NOTHING, PERFECTO! He had 14 strike-outs, a new personal best for him surpassing his previous best of 13, it was pure excitement in the ballpark tonight. Also, some great DEFENSE on the field as well, an amazing catch by Right-fielder, Gregor Blanco- diving catch in Triples Alley- a place where very few balls are caught- such excitement. We won the game 10-0, every inning was packed with great, perfect playing baseball. I am once again on a GIANTS high, but really must get to bed and sleep for an early day tomorrow.
I really do feel that my dad was watching down from Heaven tonight, he was there at Pac Bell, he was a part of this day in Baseball History! Big week for our family...June 10th my Anniversary, June 13th Dad's Birthday, June 14th Mom & Dad's Anniversary- this year would have been 60 years! Of course, this week of the year always included Father's Day as well!
Today was Dad's birthday, he would have been 83 years old and it is sad that he was taken from us at the very young age of 60, to think that he will have been gone 23 years in September just blows my mind. He certainly fought a good fight, but just had to fight it at such a young age, especially when you compare him to my mom who has pretty much been in excellent health until the last two years and she is quite the fighter. It makes me proud to know that I come from such strong, feisty genes!
When picking my Giants game this season, like always I try to get weekend games first and then if I have to get weeknight games it has to be nights that I don't teach at the gym and then I'll usually get 1-2 day games because after all, it's fun to play hooky every now and then and spend a workday afternoon at the ballpark! Well, knowing June 13th was my Dad's birthday, the Giants were in town and it was a Wednesday night, one that I don't teach, I had to get those tickets. I took my brother with me tonight, which is also fitting because I know that Dad has been proud over the years to look down and see us at so many Giants games, following his footsteps so to speak. I have always said that once Pac Bell Park was built (yes, it is always Pac Bell to me, although I can sort of grasp AT&T park, never grabbed SBC park), but I have always felt my Dad's presence at the ballpark. I actually had tears the first time I was at the park because I just knew that my dad would have loved that place and he would have loved to see his team playing there.
I grew up going to Giants games with my Dad on weekends and holidays- we sat 3 rows behind home plate and I got to meet many players over the years. I was a true fan from that young age, loved my Giants through thick and thin. I have been riding the highs for the last decade at Pac Bell park with all of the Barry Bonds milestones, the World Series in 2002 and then the World Series in 2010 and tonight adding to the excitement- Franchise History in the making, Matt Cain pitches a no-hitter, a perfect game- no hits, no walks, no errors- NADA, NOTHING, PERFECTO! He had 14 strike-outs, a new personal best for him surpassing his previous best of 13, it was pure excitement in the ballpark tonight. Also, some great DEFENSE on the field as well, an amazing catch by Right-fielder, Gregor Blanco- diving catch in Triples Alley- a place where very few balls are caught- such excitement. We won the game 10-0, every inning was packed with great, perfect playing baseball. I am once again on a GIANTS high, but really must get to bed and sleep for an early day tomorrow.
I really do feel that my dad was watching down from Heaven tonight, he was there at Pac Bell, he was a part of this day in Baseball History! Big week for our family...June 10th my Anniversary, June 13th Dad's Birthday, June 14th Mom & Dad's Anniversary- this year would have been 60 years! Of course, this week of the year always included Father's Day as well!
Monday, June 11, 2012
And then there were 9...
9 toes that is! My mom is now officially a toe amputee. They did the surgery yesterday and as promised I received a phone call from mom's Doctor as soon as it was over- during our Anniversary Brunch at the Westin Verasa in Napa. She told me that all went well and that mom was in recovery and for me to go on and enjoy the rest of the day and celebrate. We did just that. I will say though that I felt very comfortable going away, knowing that my mom was having surgery and I can only believe that my comfort was a direct result of the fabulous care that she is under with Dr. Gillon. This woman has taken mom under her wings. In an email exchange, she says to me "I have grown very fond of your mother and admire how feisty and determined she
is to get through this. You too deserve much credit. I have taken care of
elderly people with vascular problems for decades now and it is rare that a
family is so involved and so caring. " My mom tells me today that just before the surgery, Dr. Gillon gave her a hug and a sweet kiss on the cheek. I have seen so many Doctors over the past few years and many have lacked a true bedside manner, many have lacked the "people" touch - it is so wonderful to have a Doctor like her involved in mom's case. I believe it has made the world of difference for mom.
I knew that my mom would be resting most of yesterday, so I didn't call- I didn't want to disturb her if she was sleeping and did expect her to be "out of it" with the pain meds. My sister texted me about 6pm to let me know that mom had called her and that she was very alert and talkative and was doing well. She was a bit upset that she had two black eyes- but Dr. Gillon had told me that even though they removed the tape from her eyes (to keep them shut), she bruises easy and would look like a raccoon for a few days. My mother was in shock when she saw herself in the mirror. Once she got the explanation, she was ok.
Bill & I went to visit her on our way home this afternoon and she was doing pretty good. She has started having "phantom pains"- which from what I've read can be pretty nasty and disturbing. Once I explained to her what it was, she was a bit relieved to know what it was. It had sort of freaked her out and sent her to tears the first time she felt the pains. I hope that these phantom pains go away quickly, I'm sure it is a weird sensation to feel a pain where your toe used to be.
I believe the Doctor will change her dressings tomorrow and take a look at it. Probably get her up to walking a tiny bit in the next 2-3 days. Hopefully, we are at the end of the medical trials and tribulations and mom can move forward with her life and start to enjoy and LIVE!
Bill & I had a wonderful Anniversary Weekend. Arrived at our hotel Saturday night close to 8pm, checked in and ordered room service dinner, enjoyed a bottle of wine with a movie on TV, cuddled up on the couch. (we had a suite) We slept in Sunday, got up for brunch and then lounged by the pool all afternoon. I did a little "work"- although I don't consider Body Pump "work"- I listened to my new music for the next release and reviewed the current release so I can teach it this week in preparation for AIM 1 workshop! We boarded the Napa Valley Wine Train Sunday evening and fortunately did get our upgrade to the Vista Dome car, which was wonderful. It was a beautiful train ride, great meal- fun times! Today we slept in a bit, headed into Yountville for lunch at Bouchon, and then stopped by Daniela's parents new place in Yountville and had a very nice visit with them. All in all a pretty great weekend. God is good.
I knew that my mom would be resting most of yesterday, so I didn't call- I didn't want to disturb her if she was sleeping and did expect her to be "out of it" with the pain meds. My sister texted me about 6pm to let me know that mom had called her and that she was very alert and talkative and was doing well. She was a bit upset that she had two black eyes- but Dr. Gillon had told me that even though they removed the tape from her eyes (to keep them shut), she bruises easy and would look like a raccoon for a few days. My mother was in shock when she saw herself in the mirror. Once she got the explanation, she was ok.
Bill & I went to visit her on our way home this afternoon and she was doing pretty good. She has started having "phantom pains"- which from what I've read can be pretty nasty and disturbing. Once I explained to her what it was, she was a bit relieved to know what it was. It had sort of freaked her out and sent her to tears the first time she felt the pains. I hope that these phantom pains go away quickly, I'm sure it is a weird sensation to feel a pain where your toe used to be.
I believe the Doctor will change her dressings tomorrow and take a look at it. Probably get her up to walking a tiny bit in the next 2-3 days. Hopefully, we are at the end of the medical trials and tribulations and mom can move forward with her life and start to enjoy and LIVE!
Bill & I had a wonderful Anniversary Weekend. Arrived at our hotel Saturday night close to 8pm, checked in and ordered room service dinner, enjoyed a bottle of wine with a movie on TV, cuddled up on the couch. (we had a suite) We slept in Sunday, got up for brunch and then lounged by the pool all afternoon. I did a little "work"- although I don't consider Body Pump "work"- I listened to my new music for the next release and reviewed the current release so I can teach it this week in preparation for AIM 1 workshop! We boarded the Napa Valley Wine Train Sunday evening and fortunately did get our upgrade to the Vista Dome car, which was wonderful. It was a beautiful train ride, great meal- fun times! Today we slept in a bit, headed into Yountville for lunch at Bouchon, and then stopped by Daniela's parents new place in Yountville and had a very nice visit with them. All in all a pretty great weekend. God is good.
Saturday, June 09, 2012
Graduations, Anniversaries & Surgeries...oh MY!
This week has been absolutely OFF THE HOOK! I am beyond exhausted- that seems to be a recurring theme that I write about, need to do something about that! I have spent the last few days helping my brother move, it has been very emotional for all of us- so hard to pack up 25 years of your life! I can only say that I have such a huge respect for my brother, he has been through so much yet still remains faithful and keeps on keepin' on. So many people would just give up or turn to dark measures if they were in his shoes. He has raised to wonderful young men...more on this later in the blog. The other night while packing and wondering if it would ever get done, he had a sentimental moment and was so grateful for his two sons. He is so proud of them and it just came shining through in our conversation. I'm sure along with the move and all the emotions involved with that, the fact that his first born, eldest son graduated today from High School was also cause for sentiment.
Last night when we all made another trip to his house to pack up another load, close to the last load, the new owners were there to receive the keys. The very ironic thing in all of this something that I just realized earlier this week is that the new owner is a gal I graduated with from Mercy High School. In fact, I attended her first wedding in the 80's! I had lost complete tough with her over the years and it was nice to see her and reunite, yet also bittersweet because although a "buyer" for my brother's house is not a bad thing- you do sort of feel like there is a victim and a villain in the situation. Hard to really explain, but it was a bit awkward. I mean it would be nice to get to know each other better again and perhaps do things socially- but it would be really weird to be invited to her house for dinner or a pool party! Just strange the way the world turns!
Today was Michael's graduation and I teared up multiple times. I am so proud of him and the man that he has become. It has not been easy on him or his brother with all this moving and transition, but he keeps on, just like his dad. In 19 years, I've only seen him lose his cool once and that was two weeks ago with all the pressure surrounding the family move. He looked so grown up today and spiffy in his dress clothes. As tired as we all were having dinner at 1am last night and ready for bed, "Uncle Bill" stayed up late enough to iron Michael's dress shirt and graduation gown. Michael looked awesome and so nicely put together. I got some great pictures of him- which thrilled me and afterwards when we caught up with him, I went to give him a congratulations hug and he really hugged back. I've hugged him many times over the years for all sorts of holidays and events, but this hug back was different- it was the hug of a mature, grown up man. Although the words were not spoken, I felt as though his hug said, "thank you for all you've done for me"- I just can't explain it any better than that- but really a very proud day for this Auntie. And it didn't end there. At lunch, my sister asked Michael if he wanted to go see his Grandmother at the hospital and he said he would- so she took him and he thought it would be a nice idea to give his Grammy his Graduation Flower Lei. She was in tears at the "gift" and the fact that it was his idea just warms my heart.
Sunday is our Anniversary, 6 years married and 8 years together. Time flies- although I feel as though I have been married to this wonderful man all my life! He has been so supportive, so loving, so caring, so giving - I often times wonder what I did to deserve him and am so incredibly thankful to have him in my life, that he loves me and has chosen me for his life partner. He's amazing. We will be taking off to Napa Sunday morning, maybe Saturday afternoon if I can get the hotel to give us the Agent rate for Saturday night- a near impossible thing in a popular destination..but I will try, I'd love to get away for 2 nights and be able to really enjoy the resort. We plan to get some pool time, work on the suntans, and then enjoy the Napa Valley Wine Train! This will be a lot of fun; however, a bit overshadowed by the fact that we learned today that mom will have Surgery on Sunday!
Yes, surgery for mom. They had tentatively scheduled her for the toe amputation on Wednesday and wanted to treat her with antibiotics until then and have surgery be the last resort. However, the discharge people and medicare people won't allow her to stay until Wednesday with the treatment plan in place. They feel it could be out-patient treatment, so given that it was a "miracle shot"- they decided to move the surgery up to Sunday and take care of the toe. Her Doctor has been fabulous and wonderfully communicative. In fact today's email from Dr. Gillon told me that "they" (she and my mom) do not want me anywhere near the hospital on Sunday, that I need to celebrate my Anniversary with my husband and that mom will be just fine. I am trying to trust in this, with any surgery there is risk and with any surgery on an 83 year old there is even more risk - even on the healthiest of people! But I will trust that it will all go fine and enjoy my time away- after all I have been ordered to do so by my mom and her Doctor! I hope that this is it, that this surgery will go smoothly and that she adapts well and quickly to the 4 toed foot. Today she was telling several jokes- all in an effort to keep herself laughing and she spoke of her mother when she had gall bladder surgery and how her mother had asked the Doctor if she could have a stone to keep and did keep one in a jar. I just looked at my mom because I just knew where she was going with this...and then she laughed and said she wasn't going to ask the Doctor, but she thought her toe in a jar might be a good conversation piece! Yes, she has officially "lost it"- but I get trying to make light of a very difficult situation. She is still grieving not being able to ever wear sandals again, of course she has not worn sandals in 10+ years!
June- WOW...can't believe we are 1/2 way through 2012!! Where does the time go?
This week has been absolutely OFF THE HOOK! I am beyond exhausted- that seems to be a recurring theme that I write about, need to do something about that! I have spent the last few days helping my brother move, it has been very emotional for all of us- so hard to pack up 25 years of your life! I can only say that I have such a huge respect for my brother, he has been through so much yet still remains faithful and keeps on keepin' on. So many people would just give up or turn to dark measures if they were in his shoes. He has raised to wonderful young men...more on this later in the blog. The other night while packing and wondering if it would ever get done, he had a sentimental moment and was so grateful for his two sons. He is so proud of them and it just came shining through in our conversation. I'm sure along with the move and all the emotions involved with that, the fact that his first born, eldest son graduated today from High School was also cause for sentiment.
Last night when we all made another trip to his house to pack up another load, close to the last load, the new owners were there to receive the keys. The very ironic thing in all of this something that I just realized earlier this week is that the new owner is a gal I graduated with from Mercy High School. In fact, I attended her first wedding in the 80's! I had lost complete tough with her over the years and it was nice to see her and reunite, yet also bittersweet because although a "buyer" for my brother's house is not a bad thing- you do sort of feel like there is a victim and a villain in the situation. Hard to really explain, but it was a bit awkward. I mean it would be nice to get to know each other better again and perhaps do things socially- but it would be really weird to be invited to her house for dinner or a pool party! Just strange the way the world turns!
Today was Michael's graduation and I teared up multiple times. I am so proud of him and the man that he has become. It has not been easy on him or his brother with all this moving and transition, but he keeps on, just like his dad. In 19 years, I've only seen him lose his cool once and that was two weeks ago with all the pressure surrounding the family move. He looked so grown up today and spiffy in his dress clothes. As tired as we all were having dinner at 1am last night and ready for bed, "Uncle Bill" stayed up late enough to iron Michael's dress shirt and graduation gown. Michael looked awesome and so nicely put together. I got some great pictures of him- which thrilled me and afterwards when we caught up with him, I went to give him a congratulations hug and he really hugged back. I've hugged him many times over the years for all sorts of holidays and events, but this hug back was different- it was the hug of a mature, grown up man. Although the words were not spoken, I felt as though his hug said, "thank you for all you've done for me"- I just can't explain it any better than that- but really a very proud day for this Auntie. And it didn't end there. At lunch, my sister asked Michael if he wanted to go see his Grandmother at the hospital and he said he would- so she took him and he thought it would be a nice idea to give his Grammy his Graduation Flower Lei. She was in tears at the "gift" and the fact that it was his idea just warms my heart.
Sunday is our Anniversary, 6 years married and 8 years together. Time flies- although I feel as though I have been married to this wonderful man all my life! He has been so supportive, so loving, so caring, so giving - I often times wonder what I did to deserve him and am so incredibly thankful to have him in my life, that he loves me and has chosen me for his life partner. He's amazing. We will be taking off to Napa Sunday morning, maybe Saturday afternoon if I can get the hotel to give us the Agent rate for Saturday night- a near impossible thing in a popular destination..but I will try, I'd love to get away for 2 nights and be able to really enjoy the resort. We plan to get some pool time, work on the suntans, and then enjoy the Napa Valley Wine Train! This will be a lot of fun; however, a bit overshadowed by the fact that we learned today that mom will have Surgery on Sunday!
Yes, surgery for mom. They had tentatively scheduled her for the toe amputation on Wednesday and wanted to treat her with antibiotics until then and have surgery be the last resort. However, the discharge people and medicare people won't allow her to stay until Wednesday with the treatment plan in place. They feel it could be out-patient treatment, so given that it was a "miracle shot"- they decided to move the surgery up to Sunday and take care of the toe. Her Doctor has been fabulous and wonderfully communicative. In fact today's email from Dr. Gillon told me that "they" (she and my mom) do not want me anywhere near the hospital on Sunday, that I need to celebrate my Anniversary with my husband and that mom will be just fine. I am trying to trust in this, with any surgery there is risk and with any surgery on an 83 year old there is even more risk - even on the healthiest of people! But I will trust that it will all go fine and enjoy my time away- after all I have been ordered to do so by my mom and her Doctor! I hope that this is it, that this surgery will go smoothly and that she adapts well and quickly to the 4 toed foot. Today she was telling several jokes- all in an effort to keep herself laughing and she spoke of her mother when she had gall bladder surgery and how her mother had asked the Doctor if she could have a stone to keep and did keep one in a jar. I just looked at my mom because I just knew where she was going with this...and then she laughed and said she wasn't going to ask the Doctor, but she thought her toe in a jar might be a good conversation piece! Yes, she has officially "lost it"- but I get trying to make light of a very difficult situation. She is still grieving not being able to ever wear sandals again, of course she has not worn sandals in 10+ years!
June- WOW...can't believe we are 1/2 way through 2012!! Where does the time go?
Wednesday, June 06, 2012
Bring on 2013 already!
I was chatting with my friend Elizabeth the other night and we have both had very trying 2012's already and were both feeling like we are ready for 2013. I honestly do not know how it is already June. It is just so crazy, but I find myself trying to visualize Thanksgiving and Christmas 2012 and what I am picturing is: health for my entire family- that my mom's horrible and long health ordeal this year is over and she is back to enjoying life and living life, the my brother is able to get the surgery that he needs and can be out of pain that he's been dealing with for 6+ months. Stability for my brother and his family- now having sold their house and have that behind them, that they will be able to rebuild a new life and get back on their feet. He has great dreams and we will know soon how those dreams will unfold- much will depend on the outcome of the bankruptcy. For now, he and his family will be living with us until he gets his money from the house sale and can move forward with his plan. On one hand, this is a HUGE adjustment for Bill & I- we are so used to living alone and having full run of the house, but it has got to be so much worse for my brother and nephews to adjust to not having full run of a house. Yes, they know that "mi casa, su casa"- but still it's just not the same. I am hoping that we can have some fun with this, gosh I have not lived with my brother since I was 9 or 10 years old? Ok- now that I put that on paper, I am officially scared!
Tonight when I went by Woodside Terrace to pick up a few things for my mom, Marguerite at the front desk said to me, "you are the glue in your family, aren't you?" - I probably talk too much about my life to people, but it is who I am. But she is right, in many ways I am the glue and I do take care of things, it is my nature. I am a fixer, I am a doer- we all have our roles in life. So many people have said how much they "admire me" or that "I'm a bigger person than they are" or that "there is no way I could do what you're doing", but I honestly believe that we all have no idea what we are capable of doing until we are put into a situation of having to do it! You just do it, when it comes to family there are no excuses you make it work.
Today was an insane day...up early, helped brother pack up the house- as much as we could, there is still much that needs to get done tomorrow. Made two trips to my house with things that were coming here. Picked up one nephew from school after his finals, had an appraiser come by my house and hopefully she will get a good value in so we can refinance. Did a tiny bit of work and then out the door I went to go by mom's apartment, then to Kohl's to look (very quickly) for an outfit that Michael could wear tonight to the awards assembly. The kid just didn't have anything between the suit and the cargo pants and I felt that he needed to be a bit more dressed up than that. I got lucky and found some pants in his size and a shirt- he liked it and they fit! After 20 minutes in Kohl's I was to the hospital for a "drive-by" to bring mom a few things and then back home for dinner, Bill ironed Michael's new clothes and we were off to the Awards Assembly. That was the first time that I really sat down today! Michael received two awards and it was a very nice event.
Mom had a pretty good day today- although she it not feeling warm and fuzzy about her Primary Care Physician. But mom is standing firm that she wants to do what her specialist wants her to do- the PCP is new and doesn't have that relationship with mom that Dr. Gillon has. Right now the plan is that they are giving her antibiotics through IV and orally to treat the toe and if there is no significant progress by 6/13- they will amputate the big toe. Mom is adjusting to the idea and trusts Dr. Gillon impeccably. We will see. Dr. Gonzalez (PCP) was talking about sending mom home and having her come to the hospital everyday for injections, but mom doesn't want to leave the hospital. Strange- usually Doctors don't push sending you home, it's usually the case workers/insurance companies that do that!
Anyway, really tired and must get up early tomorrow for an 8am meeting, will get some work done and will then probably help a good portion of the day with packing/moving etc. Still a lot of crap that needs to get moved- it's 25 years of stuff, both personal and business- not easy at all!
I will continue to pray for things to get better for everyone and for this year to take a turn up and only positive things from here on out. It is just a really emotionally draining year thus far and at this pace, I'm ready for 2013 in a big way!
I was chatting with my friend Elizabeth the other night and we have both had very trying 2012's already and were both feeling like we are ready for 2013. I honestly do not know how it is already June. It is just so crazy, but I find myself trying to visualize Thanksgiving and Christmas 2012 and what I am picturing is: health for my entire family- that my mom's horrible and long health ordeal this year is over and she is back to enjoying life and living life, the my brother is able to get the surgery that he needs and can be out of pain that he's been dealing with for 6+ months. Stability for my brother and his family- now having sold their house and have that behind them, that they will be able to rebuild a new life and get back on their feet. He has great dreams and we will know soon how those dreams will unfold- much will depend on the outcome of the bankruptcy. For now, he and his family will be living with us until he gets his money from the house sale and can move forward with his plan. On one hand, this is a HUGE adjustment for Bill & I- we are so used to living alone and having full run of the house, but it has got to be so much worse for my brother and nephews to adjust to not having full run of a house. Yes, they know that "mi casa, su casa"- but still it's just not the same. I am hoping that we can have some fun with this, gosh I have not lived with my brother since I was 9 or 10 years old? Ok- now that I put that on paper, I am officially scared!
Tonight when I went by Woodside Terrace to pick up a few things for my mom, Marguerite at the front desk said to me, "you are the glue in your family, aren't you?" - I probably talk too much about my life to people, but it is who I am. But she is right, in many ways I am the glue and I do take care of things, it is my nature. I am a fixer, I am a doer- we all have our roles in life. So many people have said how much they "admire me" or that "I'm a bigger person than they are" or that "there is no way I could do what you're doing", but I honestly believe that we all have no idea what we are capable of doing until we are put into a situation of having to do it! You just do it, when it comes to family there are no excuses you make it work.
Today was an insane day...up early, helped brother pack up the house- as much as we could, there is still much that needs to get done tomorrow. Made two trips to my house with things that were coming here. Picked up one nephew from school after his finals, had an appraiser come by my house and hopefully she will get a good value in so we can refinance. Did a tiny bit of work and then out the door I went to go by mom's apartment, then to Kohl's to look (very quickly) for an outfit that Michael could wear tonight to the awards assembly. The kid just didn't have anything between the suit and the cargo pants and I felt that he needed to be a bit more dressed up than that. I got lucky and found some pants in his size and a shirt- he liked it and they fit! After 20 minutes in Kohl's I was to the hospital for a "drive-by" to bring mom a few things and then back home for dinner, Bill ironed Michael's new clothes and we were off to the Awards Assembly. That was the first time that I really sat down today! Michael received two awards and it was a very nice event.
Mom had a pretty good day today- although she it not feeling warm and fuzzy about her Primary Care Physician. But mom is standing firm that she wants to do what her specialist wants her to do- the PCP is new and doesn't have that relationship with mom that Dr. Gillon has. Right now the plan is that they are giving her antibiotics through IV and orally to treat the toe and if there is no significant progress by 6/13- they will amputate the big toe. Mom is adjusting to the idea and trusts Dr. Gillon impeccably. We will see. Dr. Gonzalez (PCP) was talking about sending mom home and having her come to the hospital everyday for injections, but mom doesn't want to leave the hospital. Strange- usually Doctors don't push sending you home, it's usually the case workers/insurance companies that do that!
Anyway, really tired and must get up early tomorrow for an 8am meeting, will get some work done and will then probably help a good portion of the day with packing/moving etc. Still a lot of crap that needs to get moved- it's 25 years of stuff, both personal and business- not easy at all!
I will continue to pray for things to get better for everyone and for this year to take a turn up and only positive things from here on out. It is just a really emotionally draining year thus far and at this pace, I'm ready for 2013 in a big way!
Sunday, June 03, 2012
..and yet another setback!
I just wonder when my mom is going to catch a break! Seriously, this health drama has gone on long enough. I know she is frustrated, disgusted and tired of the bull! Honestly, so am I! You just don't realize how much of a toll all of this takes on you while you're going through it until you have a bit of a reprieve and then it hits you when you're back in the bull once again! Mom had another setback on Saturday- she had issues with diarrhea Saturday early morning, then her blood pressure was very low- the nurses at Woodside Terrace monitored her and said that her blood pressure remained low. They called me. I was all the way out in Livermore and had to leave the girls day of fun early to take mom to the ER. They did admit her, mainly because blood work showed some sort of infection, which we know she has the toe infection- still waiting to see if that is all she has; however, today they did confirm that she has C-Diff once again! Really? I have no idea how one can continue to catch this awful infection over and over again. It's so unfair! Of course, we know that long term antibiotic use is usually a trigger and she has been on them for a long time, if not one form, then another. They are now treating her with the Vancomycin both orally for the stomach and IV for the foot. Hopefully, we will have more news tomorrow when everyone works at the hospital and we can talk to Doctors.
She was looking so forward to this weekend, especially to today. Her plans included going to church, then bingo at the Senior Center and then BBQ at our house for her Grandson's birthday. She had to miss all of that- it's just really unfair. Why do bad things happen to good people? Why do good people have to suffer? Of course, now she is so afraid that she won't ever be independent again if she is going to have this C-diff returning all the time. How horrible for her...for all of us. It's so hard to try to keep someone optimistic when even you have a hard time being optimistic. Tomorrow I am going to bring her leftovers from the BBQ for lunch, she is looking forward to that.
Our weekend, otherwise was very fun and action packed. So much that I am exhausted and plan to get to bed here in the next 30 minutes- tops! Yes, before midnight! I had no desire to get up and out of bed this morning and it was really a push to get moving and go shopping for BBQ needs! I am blessed to have such a wonderful husband who helps with everything. "Team Horst" as my friend Mary calls it. We shopped together, at times splitting up in the store to save time and then he prepped food while I went to visit mom and bring her stuff, then once I returned we got the dining room table prepared and set for company. He did most of the cooking with the help of our Brother-in-Law who is helplessly drawn to any Bar-B-Que, he just can't help himself. He really is "grill master Bill"- but his name is Roger. :) My brother did his part at the end of the meal and served up the cake for his son and my sister did her part by making salads and cutting up the ribs. A "TEAM" effort all the way through.
It was a very fun weekend with two great concerts Thursday and Friday nights. Saturday fun Body Pump class with a full house, then Bocce Ball, wine, lunch and great gal pals in Livermore. Bill had a fun "boys day" in SF with his buddy Joe at the Giants game with lunch before and dinner out after...very eventful!! No wonder I'm tired!
Looking ahead to a busy week, hopefully a productive week for work- much to get done and it's a short work week for me with Michael's graduation Friday and next week is a short week since Bill & I are taking Monday off for our Anniversary! I absolutely LOVE how we really take time to celebrate our Anniversary- we make is a very special day- as it should be! I can't even begin to say how excited I am to get away next weekend to Napa with him, even though it's just one night- we are going to have such a great time celebrating 6 years of marriage and 8 years of being together! Looks like I won't need to take mom to her two Doctor appointments this week - sadly. But there will be daily visits to the hospital to try to keep her spirits up. Given the C-diff, I'm guessing she is there for at least a few days- and I hope that they make progress on her toe infection, enough to determine if they will be able to save it and honestly if they don't think they can save it, then maybe now is the time to take care of that so she can put all this medical crap behind her and get back to normal!
So off I go, to bed- going to start this week off on the right foot with lots of rest!
I just wonder when my mom is going to catch a break! Seriously, this health drama has gone on long enough. I know she is frustrated, disgusted and tired of the bull! Honestly, so am I! You just don't realize how much of a toll all of this takes on you while you're going through it until you have a bit of a reprieve and then it hits you when you're back in the bull once again! Mom had another setback on Saturday- she had issues with diarrhea Saturday early morning, then her blood pressure was very low- the nurses at Woodside Terrace monitored her and said that her blood pressure remained low. They called me. I was all the way out in Livermore and had to leave the girls day of fun early to take mom to the ER. They did admit her, mainly because blood work showed some sort of infection, which we know she has the toe infection- still waiting to see if that is all she has; however, today they did confirm that she has C-Diff once again! Really? I have no idea how one can continue to catch this awful infection over and over again. It's so unfair! Of course, we know that long term antibiotic use is usually a trigger and she has been on them for a long time, if not one form, then another. They are now treating her with the Vancomycin both orally for the stomach and IV for the foot. Hopefully, we will have more news tomorrow when everyone works at the hospital and we can talk to Doctors.
She was looking so forward to this weekend, especially to today. Her plans included going to church, then bingo at the Senior Center and then BBQ at our house for her Grandson's birthday. She had to miss all of that- it's just really unfair. Why do bad things happen to good people? Why do good people have to suffer? Of course, now she is so afraid that she won't ever be independent again if she is going to have this C-diff returning all the time. How horrible for her...for all of us. It's so hard to try to keep someone optimistic when even you have a hard time being optimistic. Tomorrow I am going to bring her leftovers from the BBQ for lunch, she is looking forward to that.
Our weekend, otherwise was very fun and action packed. So much that I am exhausted and plan to get to bed here in the next 30 minutes- tops! Yes, before midnight! I had no desire to get up and out of bed this morning and it was really a push to get moving and go shopping for BBQ needs! I am blessed to have such a wonderful husband who helps with everything. "Team Horst" as my friend Mary calls it. We shopped together, at times splitting up in the store to save time and then he prepped food while I went to visit mom and bring her stuff, then once I returned we got the dining room table prepared and set for company. He did most of the cooking with the help of our Brother-in-Law who is helplessly drawn to any Bar-B-Que, he just can't help himself. He really is "grill master Bill"- but his name is Roger. :) My brother did his part at the end of the meal and served up the cake for his son and my sister did her part by making salads and cutting up the ribs. A "TEAM" effort all the way through.
It was a very fun weekend with two great concerts Thursday and Friday nights. Saturday fun Body Pump class with a full house, then Bocce Ball, wine, lunch and great gal pals in Livermore. Bill had a fun "boys day" in SF with his buddy Joe at the Giants game with lunch before and dinner out after...very eventful!! No wonder I'm tired!
Looking ahead to a busy week, hopefully a productive week for work- much to get done and it's a short work week for me with Michael's graduation Friday and next week is a short week since Bill & I are taking Monday off for our Anniversary! I absolutely LOVE how we really take time to celebrate our Anniversary- we make is a very special day- as it should be! I can't even begin to say how excited I am to get away next weekend to Napa with him, even though it's just one night- we are going to have such a great time celebrating 6 years of marriage and 8 years of being together! Looks like I won't need to take mom to her two Doctor appointments this week - sadly. But there will be daily visits to the hospital to try to keep her spirits up. Given the C-diff, I'm guessing she is there for at least a few days- and I hope that they make progress on her toe infection, enough to determine if they will be able to save it and honestly if they don't think they can save it, then maybe now is the time to take care of that so she can put all this medical crap behind her and get back to normal!
So off I go, to bed- going to start this week off on the right foot with lots of rest!
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